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Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells

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#1Rosemary Ysgarlad 

Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Empty Sun Oct 23, 2016 12:08 pm

Rosemary Ysgarlad
Name: Hoshi Dōteki  (動的星 lit. "Kinetic Star")
Rank:  D
Mana Cost: 025 MC
Requirements: Heavenly Body Magic
Type: Offensive
Element: Light
Range: 05 Meters
Cooldown: 01 Posts
Duration: 02 Duration
Effect: Through the activation of her ability with a stroke of her hair by taking a hand full of it and simply giving a slight flip; her elongated hair shall begin to channel a golden aura, signifying that her ability has come to into play. Through her hazel eye(s) becoming that of a crimson color, she will begin to break the ground itself beneath her as a slight crack will come to show. By allowing herself to "charge" up, she will ready herself upon the second post to deliver a physical kick that will deal D-Class damage.

Name: Ama no Seiren Ya (天聖練矢 lit. "Heaven's Sacred Arrow")
Rank: D
Mana Cost: 025 MC
Requirements: Heavenly Body Magic
Type: Offensive
Element: Light
Range: 05 Meters
Cooldown: 01 Posts
Duration: Instant
Effect: Through the extension of her hand. Rosemary position both her arms as if she were a wielding a bow and arrow; in an instant she will manifest a bright, shining bow––string in her left palm, with the bow in her right. Rosemary will come to manifest an arrow right after, the arrow itself manifesting in a shimmering light as, once released, damage dealt will be D-class.  The arrow itself is at least 6 feet long.

Name: Hoshi no Shichi Mai! (星舞七爆 lit. "Dance of the Seven Stars!")
Rank: D
Mana Cost: 025 MC
Requirements: Heavenly Body Magic
Type: Offensive
Element: Light
Range: 05 Meters
Cooldown: 01 Posts
Duration: Instant
Effect: Through an elegant dance, Rosemary will manifest seven spheres of pure photon to emerge from out of thin air. These photon, resembling the shapes of stars, will come to be launched toward those deemed the users enemies. The damage dealt will come to be 1/7th, D-Class, and blunt.  The size of the photon's circumference would also be 30-30inch, resembling a basketball.

Name: Datenshi (だてんし lit. "Fallen Angel")
Rank: D
Mana Cost: 025 MC
Requirements: Heavenly Body Magic
Type: Supplementary
Element: Light
Range: 05 Meters
Cooldown: 01 Posts
Duration: Sustain
Effect: With an extension of her either arm, she will cry to the heavenly stars above "Datneshi". And through the sound of this call she is capable of manifesting pure wings, which are crafted out of light, to manifest upon either her back or another's. By doing so a series of golden-like feathers will stir throughout the battlefield. These wings, resembling angelic ones, will allow the wearer to soar about the skies, now possessing the capability to travel at her own speed.  

Name: Nankan no Hoshi, Kotowaru! (難関恒星断る lit. "Barrier of the Stars, Reject!")
Rank: D
Mana Cost: 025 MC
Requirements: Heavenly Body Magic
Type: Defensive
Element: Light
Range: 05 Meters
Cooldown: 01 Posts
Duration:  Sustain
Effect: Through the manifestation of extending her arms, she will be able to summon a transparent barrier in the shape of either a star or a triangle. The height of the barrier being, at least, a minimum of 8 feet tall with a width of 4. The barrier possesses the capability to block any spell that is of the same rank of this spell. If no one has come to attack her shield yet, she is then capable of sustaining for as long as she pleases.



Last edited by Rosemary Ysgarlad on Sun Oct 23, 2016 8:59 pm; edited 3 times in total



love is not a weakness.
Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Pjsy5Jz2Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Pjsy5Jz2Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Pjsy5Jz2
#2Rosemary Ysgarlad 

Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Empty Sun Oct 23, 2016 1:55 pm

Rosemary Ysgarlad
Done!



love is not a weakness.
Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Pjsy5Jz2Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Pjsy5Jz2Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Pjsy5Jz2
#3Shin Katari 

Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Empty Sun Oct 23, 2016 4:54 pm

Shin Katari
Hey there, I shall be reviewing your spells!

Kinetic Star:

  • Make duration either 2 posts or Instant
  • Either make it a punching attack or a beam attack, not both 
  • Remove the mention of speed
  • Needs some kind of motion to active the spell (depending on whether you choose to make it a punch or a beam)
  • Remove the following "From the damage that is met through physical contact and/or any type of blunt damage consisting of magical energy that equals the same rank of her current class level."


Heaven's Sacred Arrow:

  • Remove the mention of speed
  • State the arrow will deal D-rank damage


Dance of the Seven Stars, Explosion:

  • Remove the mention of speed
  • This attack does both blunt and explosion damage; please choose one or the other
  • Remove the 1x3M from range and incorporate into the spell description 


Fallen Angel:

  • Rank should be D-rank
  • You must have one set motion so please remove "or some other form of motion"


Barrier of the Stars, Reject:

  • Make duration either sustained or instant
  • It can only block a D-rank spell before being destroyed, nothing above it


Please make these edits, thank you.

#4Rosemary Ysgarlad 

Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Empty Sun Oct 23, 2016 5:10 pm

Rosemary Ysgarlad
Edited.



love is not a weakness.
Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Pjsy5Jz2Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Pjsy5Jz2Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Pjsy5Jz2
#5Shin Katari 

Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Empty Sun Oct 23, 2016 7:47 pm

Shin Katari
Kinetic Star:

  • I should have stated this earlier so please forgive me, but you cannot send back the opponents attack. There are a lot of confusing aspects to this spell, such ". From the damage that is met through physical contact and/or any type of blunt damage." Also, what exactly does it mean to "survive" the damage? So please, clarify this spell or change it into a different one. Thank you.


Haven's Sacred Arrow:

  • Provide a size for the arrow


Dance of the Seven Stars:

  • By having 7 photon's each photon will do 1/7 D-rank damage. Only if all 7 connect will this do full D-rank damage. You may want to alter this to only one photon or you may keep it as is.
  • Provide a size for the photon
  • Please remove the mention of speed


Fallen Angel:


  • State she travels at her own speed



Barrier of the Star, Reject:
"The barrier possesses the capability to reject/block any spell that is of the same rank of this spell, but will shatter instantly upon contact with a spell of the same rank." Please remove the words I have bolded.

Thank you.

#6Rosemary Ysgarlad 

Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Empty Sun Oct 23, 2016 8:44 pm

Rosemary Ysgarlad
Edited.



love is not a weakness.
Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Pjsy5Jz2Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Pjsy5Jz2Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Pjsy5Jz2
#7Shin Katari 

Rosemary Ysgarlad's Starting Spells  Empty Sun Oct 23, 2016 9:00 pm

Shin Katari
Congratulations, these spells have been approved.

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