He smiled, it was wide, sincere and warm for the most part. It was relieving that she wasn’t angry, he was nothing to her and thus she had no reason to be anymore or any less furious at him. He took a knee and looked up at her, viewing her features one last time before their separation, Kenny would never see this woman again, and he was okay with that. The say with Aonaka was a mistake, him coming here was a mistake, he deluded himself into thinking he could kindle a flame with someone like this, someone like her. Well he was wrong, dead wrong, she was someone he couldn’t comprehend nor could he fantham who she really was and where she came from. In the end, this end, the punctuation mark he was right back where he started before they met; alone...
Loneliness wasn’t something that got to Kenny, he felt like he could move on from this, pick himself up and just do things on his own for a while. Not like it mattered, he was bound to die alone, bound to be slain and forgotten like a faint memory. It was a grim reality, but it was best he did this now and get it over with, let her go find someone on her level, he could let her live a more fulfilling life with someone who had everything he didn’t; wealth, looks, personality, where she would prosper he would be happy for her, as she moved on he would fade away and classify himself as obsolete. Kenny Obsolete, that’d be a better fit than Omega, heh. To think just a few days ago he swore up and down that this was the woman for him.
She became cold not too soon after, the weight put on his chest dissipated into a feeling of warmth, no, this was bitterness creeping up on him. “I never said how you felt, never made an assumption, or assertion about your personal feelings.” he stared into her ruby eyes, there they were again. It was a strange shit, they were once lovely purple pools, now they were fierce and red. This wasn’t the woman he knew, and honestly he was glad to have this happen. He didn’t know who she was and he didn’t want to know anymore.
“You know I was delusional,.” he sighed standing up, “I would give the world to have you by my side Lilja.”
Kenny paused crossing his arms, “I will tell you one thing, one day I will be good enough for you, but If that day never comes and you love another I will envy them for the rest of my days, not out of jealousy, but because of how lucky they are to have you and Victorie.”
Damn he was talking a lot, he never spoke this much “But if you don’t find another, and our paths cross…” he stood up, looking down at the woman, amber eyes narrowed in a sharp gaze, “You will be mine again, so don’t see this as a goodbye, but a promise that I will be back.” with little hesitation he attempted to steal one last kiss, to leave a coal of his burning admiration for her in the pit of her mind.
What could he say, when it came to this woman he was delusional, foolish, and weak, but to say he didn’t care about her was a lie. Was he wishy washy? Yes, did he care? Nope.