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First S-rank spell

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#1Alisa 

First S-rank spell Empty Wed Aug 23, 2017 4:21 pm

Alisa


_____________________________________________________




Name: Vajradehā (वज्रदेहा)
Rank: S
Mana Cost: 400
Requirements: Crystal Magic
Type: Offensive
Element: Crystal (No element)
Range: 25 Meters
Cooldown: 5 Posts
Duration: Sustain
Effect: Activated by clenching her fist, Alisa adopts a crystalline form over her body, clothes, and weapons. While in this form, she can project her crystallizing touch as an S-rank damaging crystal beam that can be controlled like a whip. The beam comes from her hand and can be up to 1m wide; Alisa can exercise some control over what it crystallizes, allowing her to grab it without hurting herself. Crystallization works like any other form of damage, gradually spreading from the point of contact over the foe as damage is sustained, up to 1m wide, S-rank damage area per turn. Targets must be linked to her body for damage to keep spreading, thus severing the beam - with S-rank damage or higher - will stop it.
Spoiler:

Training this (4000 words)



Last edited by Alisa Vollan on Fri Sep 01, 2017 12:04 pm; edited 11 times in total




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Fortune Wheel | Victory Road | Dice Game

"Would you like a glimpse of real beauty, Guest?"

First S-rank spell CyhFjWA

Main theme ~ Serious Fight!
#2Venus Rosé 

First S-rank spell Empty Wed Aug 30, 2017 4:34 am

Venus Rosé

White Empress:

  • Since your magic is non-elemental damage, your spell cannot deal freezing damage nor freeze the enemy. Please edit that part.
  • The spell has too many effects, such as doing freezing damage and being able to cast beams at the same time. You cannot do both.
  • This type of spell cannot be sustained because you would be releasing beams every single post without going through the cooldown. Please change it to Instant.


Bump when done.



#3Alisa 

First S-rank spell Empty Wed Aug 30, 2017 5:18 am

Alisa

The beams' total size can't exceed 1m now.

Shooting multiple beams/projectiles from a sustained spell has been approved for several other magics now.

As for the damage, freezing just happens to be the closest to what crystallizing would do (that has been approved here and in my profile) - since it's already described in my magic, i got rid of it




Sheet | Relationship Plotter | GFX
Fortune Wheel | Victory Road | Dice Game

"Would you like a glimpse of real beauty, Guest?"

First S-rank spell CyhFjWA

Main theme ~ Serious Fight!
#4Venus Rosé 

First S-rank spell Empty Wed Aug 30, 2017 6:31 am

Venus Rosé

That is fine however, you still have multiple effects in your spell. Your first effect is to crystallize any enemy that gets close to you. The next effect is you summoning beams and dealing damage. You cannot have both in the same spell, either you crystallize the enemy with the AoE effect or you summon beams.



#5Alisa 

First S-rank spell Empty Wed Aug 30, 2017 7:44 am

Alisa

Specified that crystallization is meant to deal damage, not traps




Sheet | Relationship Plotter | GFX
Fortune Wheel | Victory Road | Dice Game

"Would you like a glimpse of real beauty, Guest?"

First S-rank spell CyhFjWA

Main theme ~ Serious Fight!
#6Naga 

First S-rank spell Empty Fri Sep 01, 2017 9:38 am

Naga
Put the image above or below the spell, not between its mandatory fields.

Activated by clenching her fist, Alisa adopts a crystalline form over her body, clothes, and weapons.

  • Activation, fine.
  • Cosmetic effects without defensive qualities, fine.

While in this form, she can project her crystallizing touch as 1m wide S-rank damaging beams from any part of her form.

  • You can only shoot one beam, unless you specify a different but exact amount which can be divided over S-rank damage (2 beams (A), 4 beams (B) etc.) The exact amount must be stated.
  • You must specify exactly where the spells come from if you go with 1 beam, 2 beams, 4 beams. Not whatever suits you in a topic.

Crystallization works like any other form of damage, gradually spreading from the point of contact over the foe as damage is sustained, and won't freeze a target in place unless she knocks out or cripples it.

  • Gradually spreading at what rate? It has a 1 meter wide diameter which means with a very minor tilt up and down, left and right, you should be able to cover a person in the same post. This is too much. The spell has more powerful qualities than S-rank shocking (Shocking Damage: The shocking-type move numbs down a small or somewhat larger area which has been hit, causing nerve damage and reducing mobility by 80-100%. In order to maintain it, it must be sustained. Example: a hand 100% mobility reduction, an arm 80% mobility reduction.). Besides that, use a different word instead of freezing, only Frost-type magics have freezing qualities.

Alisa can produce extra beams from separate locations, halving the damage and size of each (up to 8 C-rank, 12cm beams) and can control their trajectory via willpower or gestures. It can never produce more than 8 beams totalling S-rank each turn, and each beam can be destroyed by damage equal to its power.

  • You must specify whether this spell is 1 beam or 2 beams or 4 beams etc. Not whatever suits you in a topic.
  • You must specify exactly where the spells come from if you go with 1 beam, 2 beams, 4 beams. Not whatever suits you in a topic.
  • You can not move spells around with willpower.

#7Alisa 

First S-rank spell Empty Fri Sep 01, 2017 12:03 pm

Alisa

redux, removed the beam splitting and turned it into a single whip




Sheet | Relationship Plotter | GFX
Fortune Wheel | Victory Road | Dice Game

"Would you like a glimpse of real beauty, Guest?"

First S-rank spell CyhFjWA

Main theme ~ Serious Fight!
#8Venus Rosé 

First S-rank spell Empty Tue Sep 05, 2017 6:58 am

Venus Rosé

This spell has been approved for training.



#9Alisa 

First S-rank spell Empty Fri Sep 08, 2017 8:39 am

Alisa




Sheet | Relationship Plotter | GFX
Fortune Wheel | Victory Road | Dice Game

"Would you like a glimpse of real beauty, Guest?"

First S-rank spell CyhFjWA

Main theme ~ Serious Fight!
#10Venus Rosé 

First S-rank spell Empty Fri Sep 08, 2017 9:37 am

Venus Rosé

This spell has been approved for usage.



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