'It's heavy' was the only way she could define it. She had to carry it around even though she never wanted to. It was always over her, casting its shadow on her life. It was hung by a thin thread, too fragile to hold something so heavy. Most of the time she didn't know what caused the thread to finally break releasing the weight on her. It fell too fast, and before she could run she'd be pinned down. It crushed her ribs, made it hard for her to breathe. She tried to scream; a cry for help was of no use. No one else could see it - the weight that had been slowly crushing her to death. Depression is the unseen, unheard, silent killer. It's the pain that's too much to cope with, too hard to deal with and so misunderstood. You can't escape it no matter how hard you try, because it follows you around like a black shadow that's on the inside, eating you. Depression means that without sound, the mind plummets downward into less and less light, and darkness beyond measure. Is there a bottom to the mind's pain? Is there any branch of hope, or something to catch or hold onto? Is there some rescuing idea that can come into the thoughts of the victim? How much darkness can one take without any light? It seems that hope cannot come from within us, so it has to enter from outside. If one can turn his thoughts toward the Almighty One, even for a flashing moment, then that will be a moment of relief. Why? Because a small light will appear in the dark thoughts, and this thought allows us to see the greatness of Him who loves us. The Light morphs into more rays of hope. Even a small ray of hope will revel His power, when we have none. In our downward plunge, a strong hand reaches, catches us, and halts our drowning in bottomless gloom. He pulls us up and we breathe in His Light. It is not total relief yet, but it is a start. Dustbowl of the soul, melting into soundless oblivion, falling, bottomless pit, nothing to grab onto, tumbling, swirling blackness, despair, gloom welling up from below, engulfed in nothingness, sinking, clawing at the walls of the pit, dragged down, swamped with negative emotion, as steady and merciless as sinking sand, smothered, helplessness, curl up, tears as silent as the grave roll in steady procession, firm grip of desolation, a void, as if the soul was being trampled on by feet in heavy boots, even sunshine seems cold. Her head wrapped itself in the nightmare that had occurred; her family's crumble. The horrid memories continued to haunt her, even to this day, a year later.

Fleur made the turn for her thirtieth lane. In the water she had no worries, no homework, no boyfriend, no nagging Mom or irritating brother - it was just her and the cool water. She moved with robotic precision but organic fluidity, stroke after stroke nailed to perfection. After years in swimming she wasn't going to compete anymore, but the pool was her therapist. Eighty laps and she was stress free and ready for a day to help someone out. It was a nice feeling, having a pool in her apartment complex.

On the beach was where Fleur found herself, not sure as to how or why she was there. Jay, the body builder from before, happened to be at the beach as well, working out as per usual. However, upon closer inspect did Fleur discover that he wasn't lifting as much as he did. She walked over, comfortable to be in the company of Jay but still didn't speak. Her only form of communication was still her body language; it worked fine and for the most part was comprehensible by everyone. He explained his side of things; how he couldn't mentally push himself in order to work out. Being the good girl she was, the pale princess offered his assistance as a spotter. As he dropped the bar and pressed up, Jay's muscle rippled through his shirt. One set, two. Three and four. Finally, he reached the final destination and his arms were wavy and tired. As he dropped the bar, his face became beet red as he struggled to pick it up. Thankfully, Fleur was there. With all her minuscule might, she pushed with him and in time, the duo set the bar upon the stand where it should be. Jay thanked Fleur for sticking with him through thick and thin, aiding him in signing up for the event last time, and payed her with Jewels for both occasions.

For at least one day, she managed to get her mind into a better state than it was previously. Hopefully the nightmares never come back.